Yesterday I had a nice drunken jam session. Didn’t record it. It was probably pretty awful anyways.
I still feel like I have a creative block. Both in audio and visual. I’ll get started on something, and after a little time on something, I just kill it. I don’t save it. It gets lost in the ether of my machine.
Like my website for example. I had a theme plotted and mostly designed. I wanted to do something based on the primitive elements. Earth, Air, Fire, Water and Spirit. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t great either. It felt like it wasn’t the thing to do. Each page color scheme was going to be based off the color of the element I felt represented that element.
And there was going to be an audio collection to go with this. But it’s all dead now.
Now it just seems all I can really do for some sort of expression is to rant on this site. A site that no one reads. I am ok with this. Its been a long time that I have been running sites that gets no interest. It is all probably just a waste of money, time and effort.
i have a lot that I want to say. And its probably better that no one reads it. I’ll just piss someone off at some point. But to get it out there makes me feel better. I’ve spent too much time conforming to rational thought that I feel like I wasn’t myself.
I will keep trying to produce stuff. I know that is the best way to get out of a block.